Tag Archives: writing

When Parenting Doesn’t Suck.

Posted on November 24, 2015 by Deep as a Birdbath

Bottom line?  Kids are maniacal, horrifying sub-humans hell bent on destroying our lives. They consistently push boundaries to the point where we lose it, consider leaving them adrift–one more word… AND YOU’RE LIVING IN THE STREETS!!  …Um, seems like I forgot the … Continue reading →

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Kids + BAND-AIDS = Unbridled Obsession.

Posted on August 2, 2015 by Deep as a Birdbath

I recently posted about kids and elevators highlighting their fascination with pressing buttons, transporting themselves up and down, a complete joke to adults.  But kids freaking love this vertical crap.  What else do kids dig?  BAND-AIDS.  This is totally appropriate … Continue reading →

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Kids and Elevators.

Posted on July 6, 2015 by Deep as a Birdbath

There’s nothing more intoxicating for kids than an elevator ride. Pressing buttons, freaking out, the range of emotions expressed during a short ride between floors is cause for drunken celebration, whacked-out posture, even inebriated fear.  They live for this sh*t. … Continue reading →

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Wisdom Teeth: The Adult Pull.

Posted on June 8, 2015 by Deep as a Birdbath

I awake from the IV a dazed giddy madman, demanding my “book.” Continue reading →

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Comic Sans Must Die!!!

Posted on November 15, 2014 by Deep as a Birdbath

I’ve had it.  I mean it.  And I’m not alone.  Just Google the title of this post.  People are pissed!  They’ve gone so far as paying for domain names like bancomicsans.com and comicsanscriminal.com, advancing their campaign to the web in … Continue reading →

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Dead Goldfish: A Harrowing True Story.

Posted on August 22, 2014 by Deep as a Birdbath

The death of any child’s pet is cause for concern, be it dog, cat, ferret, crustacean, or in our case, the frighteningly disposable goldfish.  The death of Dashey, Jack’s morbidly obese goldfish, is not only a familial loss, it’s a … Continue reading →

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Side Effects ( ( ( ( ((May)) ) ) ) ) Occur.

Posted on May 5, 2014 by Deep as a Birdbath

Assuming you’re not Superman or Woman, it’s likely you’ve “benefited” from some form of pharmaceutical.  Born on Krypton, bereft of it on Earth, you don’t need pharmaceuticals.  Or do you?  What’s my point.  Have you ever r-e-a-l-l-y read the Prescription … Continue reading →

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School Bus Memories (Some Illicit).

Posted on April 19, 2014 by Deep as a Birdbath

Most of us had them, at least in the beginning, the bus that took us away from our parents–our security–to something called “school” where we had to sit still, listen and learn.  What a load of crap that was.  The … Continue reading →

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Our Neighbors as Literary Characters.

Posted on October 17, 2013 by Deep as a Birdbath

Easiest one? Boo Radley, our next door mystery man.  Wild-eyed, saddled by a quiet physical intensity, our Boo doesn’t leave cool stuff in the open knot of a tree, rather, he drops spent cigs along our property line.  Ok, not … Continue reading →

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The Existentialism of Party Mix.

Posted on May 3, 2013 by Deep as a Birdbath

Potato chips?  Mundane.  Pretzels?  Pedestrian.  Cheese doodles?  Lame.  While not the sole ingredients, when in combination, the previous snack foods represent the almighty backbone, an evolutionary taste bud leap from the myopic to the sublime.  Including the above, Party Mix, … Continue reading →

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