Tag Archives: life

Kids and Elevators.

There’s nothing more intoxicating for kids than an elevator ride. Pressing buttons, freaking out, the range of emotions expressed during a short ride between floors is cause for drunken celebration, whacked-out posture, even inebriated fear.  They live for this sh*t. … Continue reading

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Comic Sans Must Die!!!

I’ve had it.  I mean it.  And I’m not alone.  Just Google the title of this post.  People are pissed!  They’ve gone so far as paying for domain names like bancomicsans.com and comicsanscriminal.com, advancing their campaign to the web in … Continue reading

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Dead Goldfish: A Harrowing True Story.

The death of any child’s pet is cause for concern, be it dog, cat, ferret, crustacean, or in our case, the frighteningly disposable goldfish.  The death of Dashey, Jack’s morbidly obese goldfish, is not only a familial loss, it’s a … Continue reading

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Side Effects ( ( ( ( ((May)) ) ) ) ) Occur.

Assuming you’re not Superman or Woman, it’s likely you’ve “benefited” from some form of pharmaceutical.  Born on Krypton, bereft of it on Earth, you don’t need pharmaceuticals.  Or do you?  What’s my point.  Have you ever r-e-a-l-l-y read the Prescription … Continue reading

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School Bus Memories (Some Illicit).

Most of us had them, at least in the beginning, the bus that took us away from our parents–our security–to something called “school” where we had to sit still, listen and learn.  What a load of crap that was.  The … Continue reading

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Sunday Mass: Hell on Earth.

At the gentle urging of my wonderful wife, I bring my 5 year-old and 2 year-old to 10am mass.  You know what’s coming–bedlam among the pews.  For those interested I’ve chronicled the debacle below.  Amen. Bedecked in a proper cardigan, … Continue reading

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Our Neighbors as Literary Characters.

Easiest one? Boo Radley, our next door mystery man.  Wild-eyed, saddled by a quiet physical intensity, our Boo doesn’t leave cool stuff in the open knot of a tree, rather, he drops spent cigs along our property line.  Ok, not … Continue reading

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