The Corpse on My Porch.

I spent some time on my wife’s Pinterest account in September, pinning ideas for Halloween.  As a first-timer I quickly realized the allure behind Pinterest–it’s porn for crafty people.  Anyway, as you might imagine, there’s no shortage of neat, cheap things you can make out of stuff you already have.  Re-purposing is one of Pinterests main themes, which I find startlingly cool.  So, here’s what we came up with…

Porch Corpse

Two kids and a mortgage doesn’t leave much discretionary income.  Keeping it on the cheap, I only bought a skull and skeleton hands (Ulna and Radius included–nice!).  Saving on the Metatarsals, Phalanges, Tibias and Fibulas, I came up with a way to “hide” his legs, reversing the Wicked Witch’s leg idiom.  Bluntly, I told myself the house fell on him.

Really, a freak accident—the house fell on him.

Did you see the pink and purple hydrangea clutched in his right hand?  So sad he didn’t get to deliver them, don’t you think?  Continuing with the prop theme, I’m thinking of breaking out the white Christmas lights–I’ll surround him in a glowing chalk outline. Yes!

I could have positioned him upright, torso only, as if clawing his way out of an unmarked grave, but I felt like that would require maintenance. . . .

“Honey, the corpse fell over again.  Would you might fixing it?”

No thanks. I went with gravity, full prostration–this corpse hasn’t moved an inch.  But I swear to you, sometimes I think he’s gonna get up, especially at night.


Insidious Hand Prints

Have you seen Insidious (2010), about astral projecting into demon-land?  Scared the sh*t out of me.  In one scene we’re treated to some pretty shocking imagery–crisp white linens desecrated by blood-red hand prints.  Cool!  Why not put them on our front door?!  Red watercolor paint from Michaels$1.99.

Guess demons don’t use doorbells.

My little devil, excuse me–I mean my son, got in on the action, too.  His prints are the little ones.  What a great helper!


I re-purposed the bottom of last year’s Christmas tree.  Below is the result.

Puddin’ onna Ritzz!

I had to cut the tree’s trunk in order to fit in the house.  Cutting twice, the first incision rendered that crooked smile.  Left on the deck, this little block smiled at me for weeks before I knew what to do with it.  I did know one thing, though–don’t throw it out.

FrankenTree’s face is littered with odds and ends leftover from DIY projects (I must be doing most things wrong if I have this much remaining hardware).

Any projects you’d like to share?

Happy Halloween!

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2 Responses to The Corpse on My Porch.

  1. Rocky Horror says:

    Love the anatomy names of his skeleton! The night picture , I keep seeing the head of a brown bear ! Optical illusion or just a Halloween trick (or treat)

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