Tag Archives: child rearing

Design Triumphs.

Posted on October 2, 2012 by

I feel assaulted by the sheer number of consumer “conveniences” out there.  I mean really, was life that unbearable without the Rabbit Wine Opener? Sure, it looks exotic–to a Nazi war criminal.  Going for $45, this horny little device evidently … Continue reading →

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Jesus, Mary and Jack: Daddy Explains Where Joseph’s Been.

Posted on September 19, 2012 by

With his second VBS* tour successfully behind him, 4 year-old Jack is a mini theologian.  Well, not really.  He’s mainly enthusiastic, a key characteristic of many religious leaders, and, like any 4 year-old, he’s intensely observing the world around him.  … Continue reading →

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Her Name is Reese.

Posted on July 6, 2012 by

My daughter (just typing this has me all choked up) will soon be 4 months old, and she’s consistently breaking my heart.  An eager explorer, she’s fascinated by all things, things we adults rarely give the time of day, recessed … Continue reading →

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Diaper Wars.

Posted on April 1, 2012 by

No one likes to change diapers.  You’re assaulted by shrieking infant-hydras, mad brachiating baby limbs, herculean diaper deposits, mountains of soiled laundry.  And the remains of a newborn’s umbilical cord, that crusty gorilla finger, further complexify the event.  You have … Continue reading →

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The Cult of Kid.

Posted on March 14, 2012 by

Having a kid is like joining a cult.  You immediately worship them, become a selfless automaton, an unwavering vessel of devotion.  We sprint in service at the slightest coo.  We kneel, penitent before their deific whims.  We change their horrifying … Continue reading →

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Toddlers vs. The Bill of Rights.

Posted on January 31, 2012 by

It’s unimaginable to think that the Bill of Rights is getting trounced by the littlest members of our community.  But it’s happening people.  Toddlers win.  Witness. Wishful thinking. The 1st Amendment, the right to assemble peaceably, is a joke.  Visit … Continue reading →

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Hermit Crab Drama: Acts I and II.

Posted on January 25, 2012 by

Act 1 Named after Rocky Balboa’s turtles, hermit crabs Cuff and Link died under shocking conditions–they froze to death, inside a heated home.  How?  We painted Jack’s room, and in hopes that paint would dry faster, we left the windows … Continue reading →

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Racing Toward Greater Responsibility (Expecting Our Second Child).

Posted on January 11, 2012 by

We’re about 8 weeks from our new arrival, a girl.  I couldn’t be happier, having witnessed the ribald male behavior of our first.  But the newborn routine is 3 years past.  Bottles, diapers, burping, monitoring every move represents a script … Continue reading →

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The Scathing Review: A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving (1973).

Posted on November 14, 2011 by

It’s widely known that Charles Schulz could be an acerbic S.O.B., as evidenced here.   Lucy’s perennial pigskin deceit kicks-off this holiday fav: Derogatory terms used in this flick include the following: Stupid (twice) Kill Devil Hate Cartoons are typically violent, … Continue reading →

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The Count Chocula Kid.

Posted on August 19, 2011 by

Week 31 An interesting evening, off to a good start, but nothing major, no sign of the shattering comedy to come.  Jack’s in his high chair.  The kitchen. The boy does his best to snag one of the star-shaped Gerber … Continue reading →

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